My Crazy Life

I have decided that maybe my life is a little too crazy to take time out to blog. I have good intentions each day to sit down and write down my thoughts, ideas, frustrations, etc but next thing I know the day is gone and no blog written.

This is not only true of blogging but many other things as well such as my Bible study, the laundry, and writing overdue thank you notes. Where does the time go? Am I the only one with this time disappearing problem? I pride myself in being a very organized person but lately I just can't seem to hold it altogether.

Last weekend was our church's first ever Women's Retreat. I was on the team that planned and the event and wouldn't you know it ONE day before the event I wake up at 5 am to the worst back pain I have ever had in my life. After an hour of trying to "walk it off", my husband finally convinced me that I needed to go to the emergency room. By 9 am I was home again with a bottle of muscle relaxers and a bottle of Vicotin. And believe it or not, by 10 am I was at the retreat site helping the others finish up the preparations.

I am wondering, why do we do this to ourselves? Is it just me that cannot seem to say "no" or be "left out" of something? It is one week after the retreat and I am still in pain. If I had only stopped long enough to take care of myself by going to the chiropractor, maybe I would be able to clean my house or do my laundry instead of whine and cry to my husband that I am in pain.

I have come to some conclusions in all of this:
1. I try to do WAY too much!
2. I don't HAVE to do half of the things I think I have to do.
3. Staying home with my family and snuggling on the couch watching a movie is what I NEED to be doing more often!
4. God is good ALL the time and ALL the time God is good!

This may seem like sort of a "downer" blog but it is not meant to be. This is self discovery at its best. When you truly and finally "get it"! I NEED to take care of myself. I have a three beautiful, growing children counting on me and they need me to be well. I don't like missing out on going somewhere with them because it will take me too long to walk from the car or because I can't sit that long. Don't get me wrong, things like planning Women's Retreats are important, but everything in moderation.

My focus has changed. God first, this is non-negotiable! But it does not mean constantly serving in abosolutely every area I can find. This means sitting on the couch in my jammies with a cup of coffee and my Bible learning everything I can about the God who went to such extremes to save me from myself. My husband second! We have been married for almost 10 years and the man has not only put up with me but still loves me, I think maybe he deserves some of my time :)! My kids come next! They are growing and changing so fast and I don't want them to think I don't have time for them. Now is the time to be so invested in them I barely have time for anything else. As far as everything else, whatever time and energy I have left, I will devote myself to it, but NOT at the expense of the top three!